Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
Randomize
