he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
Randomize
