found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
