my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
The police scanner is talking about you again....
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize
