We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
Randomize
