No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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