Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
why does every cop we meet know your name?
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
