the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
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