Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Randomize
