do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
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