do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
Randomize
