I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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