She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Randomize
