did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize