My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Randomize