Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Randomize
