I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
I spent all night sexting your girlfriend for you because you were too drunk. You're welcome.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
