no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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