actually, I'm a sock model
There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize