brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
Randomize
