I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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