omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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