They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
