so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
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