Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
Randomize
