I molested 6 butterflies tonight
Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
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