i just ordered a pitcher of margaritas for me and a friend but she called and canceled. oh well, looks like im getting trashed alone.
the waiter who hardly speaks english told me "i go get your medicine now"
this medicine is soooo good.
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
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