Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
