I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
I have feelings that need drinking.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
Randomize