I just saw a hobo shake a payphone until it spat out a bunch of quarters. what a champ.
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
