Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
Randomize
