well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
Randomize
