They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
Randomize
