Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
Randomize
