The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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