that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
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