I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
