I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
Randomize
