My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Randomize
