I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
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