The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
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