Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
Randomize
