It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
The air taste purple.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
