i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
Randomize
