Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
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