My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
