thus making me awesome and them whores
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
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