This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
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