4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
everyone is single if you try hard enough
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize
