apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
handjob tips. give me some.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
Send help, water and tortillas.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
