How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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