That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
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